It's certainly been a while since I've posted an entry, so I suppose it's about time to just state a few things about the current state of my life:

I finished my first year of college and I absolutely loved it. College is where I am supposed to be, it's where I am most at home, and where I've truly found my element.

I resigned myself to not being able to find a job in Eugene. After trying for a month and a half, I decided it was in vain and now spend my time playing video games and generally fucking around.

I was originally going to talk about a lot more in this entry, such as my sister's pregnancy, my brother going back to school, etc. But I've decided to just leave it here, because who needs to discuss those things? I'm a journaler (by pen, not by internet), so I already have it recorded and thus, recording it on the internet is fruitless and pointless.

I'll leave this here and who knows, it may be the last you hear from me.

Keep love alive and best wishes,
Mish X♥X♥

( Follow )

Being a creative writing major does not necessarily implicate that I have a huge vocabulary. Well, I guess I know a lot of big words...I just don't use them, but I'm not entirely sure why.

Up until, well today, around 2PM, I never read with a dictotionary nearby. Today, I told myself, hey lazy, get that dictionary and do some analysis, goddammit!! I, too, am surprised I passed my first term of college, considering...I didn't own a dictionary.

Today, I compiled a list of words I want to work into my vocabulary:
Judeo-
Polyp
"Bocage"
Auroch
Crystallization
Carcinoma
Occidental
Atavism
Anthropocentric
Impetus
Impelling
Axiom
Megatonnage
Vaunted
Insidious
Anathema
Morass

I am surprised I never did this before. Damn, I wish I were smarter. Maybe I'll just get really fat. I'm sure I could still find someone who loved me, even though I was a gluttonous, mushy, 800 pound woman who would be impossibe to get bu-zay with.

I haven't written a good livejournal entry in forever and a half. So here it is.

I woke up in a great mood. Fantastic. Prompty took a shower, got ready, and them slammed my fingers in my desk drawer. These are those really old dorm drawers that are like, massive pieces of shit, and just do nothing but harm individuals. They are the work of Satan... really. So after assuming the fetal position for 15 minutes, I had to book it to class, bruised fingers and all.

The rest of the day breezed pass, I didn't pay too much attention. Around 6:30, I was listening to my iPod, decided to eat some dinner. Turn off my iPod. Place in drawer. Shut drawer. 7:30 PM, decide to listen to iPod. Remove iPod from drawer. Turn on. Wait. It's not turning on. PIECE OF SHIT. So I had to put in a service order (after trying to fix it with Apple's advice on every page I could find which consisted of "plug in - wait for iTunes." Oh wait, iTunes couldn't detect and/or read my iPod, lot of good THAT does me.) but they won't send the box (so I can send them my iPod) to my college mailbox. NOOOOOO. So they have to send it to my parents house in Oregon. Great. So I have ten business days for my mom to receive the box, send me the box, and for me to send the box back to Apple. Fan-fucking-tastic.

It turns out I am not alone and iPod nano (3rd gens) are breaking down all over the country. Piece of shit. Sorry, Apple, I love you. I love my Mac. But seriously. For an iPod to just...STOP...working is just massively shitty and you know it. Fix it, Apple. Fix it.

You deserve pictures.
( Read more... )

Oh man, I haven't written in forever.

I shouldn't apologize, I guess. It's not like I have legions of readers. In fact, I feel slightly ashamed that I have a livejournal anymore, because it seems really emo and sad now.

Otherwise, my life has been good. I got all A's my first term of college. I enjoyed it. I have a lot of friends. My last post was bitchy to the extreme. Ridiculous. But I still don't like all those people though, lol!!! The group of girls I used to hang out with I now realize are the most self centered, stupid, and immature individuals ever. I find them disgusting and am personally offended that they are taking scholarship money from me.

Well, this is it probably for a while.

Laters, homes.
Mish

These are all the personalities and hang ups of the people I've experienced at college thus far.

Names HAVE been changed to protect the innocent.

Installment 1

1. "Amanda" - Think of every single attention whore you ever knew in high school. Now throw in a fake pseudo-skater "style" and a vast amount of laziness, combined with homegrown hicktown "it's all about me" syndrome, and BAM, you've got Amanda. From hearing her complain about how the guy she likes is "mean" to her (i.e., he has a girlfriend and therefore, is not interested) to hearing her complain about failing tests because she doesn't do homework, you kind of want to smack her. She has the capacity to be very smart, to be very cool, but she comes off as retarded. Dear Amanda, welcome to college. Leave high school behind. And stop bitching. People only like you because you'll backstab them the second you get the chance. And trust me, one day, someone's gonna fuck you up faster than you can say "but it's not fair!!"

2. "Sara" - This girl was an A++ student in California. LOL. Yeah, I laughed too. As if that's super difficult in the little ghetto town she comes from. Most of the kids were either heroin addicts or "gangstahs", so she was, to say the least, at the top of the food chain. However, in college, it is revealed how inherently stupid she is. She was making a copy of something black and white and it's one of those printers with the "color" or "b&w" copy options. And she goes "but if I chose color, it would put color into it right." To which, I stared at her. She's also a grade A whiner. I listened to her whine to her sister about how she actually has to STUDY for tests!! And science is SOO hard!! And I'm SOOO confused!! And it's not FAAAAAIR!!! BAAAWW. Dear Sara, welcome to college. Or actually, no. Go find a man. Get married. Pop out a baby. Not EVERYONE is meant for higher education...

3. "Renee" - I actually really like this girl. The thing is though, she talks in this really FAKE soft voice and she doesn't swallow enough, so her voice always sounds wet. Does that make sense? Plus, she's obsessed with her image and whines about her hair all the time. Dear Amber, grow up. you're really smart. Like actually smart. Stop whining about stuff that no longer matters. Welcome to college.

4. "Ramona" - Despite being a Mormon, Ramona is actually really cool. She's not a preachy Mormon and considers herself to be a non-conservative Mormon. However, she demands attention at all times (like everyone ELSE apparently) and can be very loud. Her outgoing-ness makes her easy to talk to, but at the same time, seriously fucking annoying. I love this girl, but soemtimes I want to kick her in the face. However, she doesn't incessantly whine, which makes her A+, and she actually has half of a brain.

5. "Raven" - This girl...is a ditz. Basically. Sometimes I really wonder how she got into the honors dorm. It really does not make sense. She seems somewhat intelligent, but sometimes, it's like "did you grow up in this century?" Dear Raven, LEARN COMPUTERS. AND LEARN WRITING SKILLS.



Next installment will be...soon.

>:D

XX Michelle

It would be called "Meth Den, the Musical" and would be able Eugene and it's surrounded "burroughs" - Cottage Grove, Creswell, Marcola, Veneta, etc. Basically, it's meth dens. Oh and Springfield, that's an important one.

Either way, it would be an epic film, with various musical numbers, such as, "Get Your Gun!" "Help! My Trailer's Exploded!" and "Damn Girl, Your Teeth Are FUCKED UP." It's cast would range from Brad Pitt (as the loveable football star of Cottage Grove High turned washed up meth addict) to Catherine Zeta Jones (as the primadonna ballerina in Eugene who moved to Veneta and spawned 14 children in 10 years and has had at least 4 trailers explode.)

The film would cost relatively little to create. Why? Besides having to record and film, make up and costumes would be relatively low cost. For authentic looking meth addicts, all one must do is repeatedly beat someone with a chair, light their clothes on fire, and then starve them for a few weeks. This leads to a nice cracked out look that is befitting of a woman sitting on the couch in her trailer, watching Oprah, trying to self actualize, smoking meth like it's candy, and screaming at her 14 children to QUIET DOWN DAMMIT despite it being a baby crying to sweet mercy.

The film would garner much attention, with it's high velocity cast and punch to the stomach plot line. Let's just say - the movie will end with a cliff hanger. A trailer explodes. Brad Pitt - dead...or ALIVE? Wait for the sequel, "The Trailer Returns, A Musical."









Oh jeez.

XX MISH

Friends are nothing but lies. You can't trust anybody. I don't anymore. Fuck this. Fuck everything.

I miss home. I miss my brother visiting on weekends and bringing Topaz with him. I miss my sister and brother-in-law visiting so they can build their house. I miss all the pets. I miss my dog. I miss my room. I miss my MOM. I miss my bed. I miss everything. This isn't home. This can't be home. It will NEVER be home. I'm miserable.

I always get left out of everything. What is it about me that says: don't return her texts; don't invite her to things; don't try to talk to her; don't include her. What is it? Is it just a sign on me that says HEY THIS GIRL DOESN'T DESERVE TO BE INCLUDED??? WTF?

And now I hear that Megan, Erin, and Jena are talking bullshit about Holly to Holly's ex, Matt, who they hate as well. Talking about how they fucking hate her and how she's a drunk whore and she tried to steal Megan's boyfriend. We're supposed to be the pandas - best friends forever. It happened THREE FUCKING MONTHS AGO, ASSHATS - Mexico was THREE FUCKING MONTHS AGO. STFU about it. Jesus Christ. We were supposed to be the girls that didn't act like that - that didn't act like girls, we didn't backstab each other, we loved each other, we had more guy friends than girlfriends. And now it's like bullshit! The minute Holly leaves it's like, oh, she's a drunk whore. Fuck that. Holly's supposed to be our FRIEND. Whatever she did when she was drunk is irrelevant. Those three act like fucking WHORES, making out with other girls REGULARLY, despite having BOYFRIENDS who they FUCK constantly, every fucking night, getting fucking TRASHED. So don't turn around and talk about Holly doing shit. The one with the most sins in the one who CASTS THE FIRST FUCKING STONE, you hypocritical "I Found GOd" ASSFUCKHATMOTHERFUCKERS.

My head is doing that weird throbbing thing like when I"m sick. But I've been crying, so maybe that's what's wrong. But I still don't feel good. I feel like shit. Sometimes I can stand these people and sometimes I really hate them. Like I fully cannot stand them. I give $2 to have our picture taken in the photobooth in wal mart and then I don't even get to be int he fucking picture? Yeah that's really nice. "NO Michelle, just lean down so you're like on top." Yeah because my head sideways looks great. Yeah, because a corner of my chin in the picture really counts. SO I walk away, pissed off, and no one asks if I'm okay. No one apologizes. No one does anything. No one suggested that they sit out (BECAUSE LAST TIME EVERYONE ELSE WAS IN THE PICTURE AND I WAS, AGAIN, JUST HALF IN) or stand up outside and try to lean in. Instead, I just get to stand outside the booth like a retard while they use my $2!!! Great. Motherfucking great. You guys are really awesome.

X♥X Mish

I write these poems all the time. Always the same format, but different meanings. I write them about characters. I write them about myself. Hm.

I Am Tight Hugs in the Rain and A Fallen Log Over a Dry Creek
I am spotted brown cows
And tight hugs in the rain in the middle of the night
And I am rap rock ringtones
And jumping over the hedges outside Figaro's.

I am standing on a fallen log over a dry creek
And hiking down a hillside in sandles holding hands
And I am listening to the sound of his head through a tuxedo
A gentle, uniform thump that tells me that he, like me, is alive.

I am a stolen mailbox still in the trunk of my car
And a British flag purchased in Monterey Bay, California
And I am Henry Rollins' poetry
And deceptive warm blankets.

I am running across the blacktop
And suntanning on the roof of my car in the parking lot
And I am white water rafting on the Payette
and staring into the faces of strangers.

I am a no name face in a pulsating crowd
I am arms up, heads back, laughter
I am the screeching of tires on pavement
I am falling asleep by the lake with the fire blazing.

I am dogs barking into the darkness
And ghost stories that I know aren't true
And I am confusion and stress
And smiles that I know aren't true.

I am broken promises
And broken friendships
And I am the knife stuck into the back of a friend
A blade so sharp it could cut through God.

I am twisted words
And I am lying poems
And I am everything you ask for
But I am nothing that can ever be retold.














Yeah. I got a little emo there are the end. I'll admit that.

X♥X, Mish

Oh wow. This deserves a cut.

( snip snip )

So I just got an e-mail on my school e-mail that some girl was drugged with Roofies at a party at one of the frats ("off campus party" as it stated, but we all know they meant...KAPPA SIGMA the nastiest, dirtiest house in Caldwell, and that includes the ESLs, the Estas Super Locos). That's really disturbing. I'm glad I avoid Kappa Sig like the plague. Delta Delta is really nice because one of the members is my first year mentor, but DAMN. Frat boys are getting fiesty if they're resorting to roofies. SICK. the girl was just found unconscious and she was fine, but...FUCK THAT'S disturbing.

X♥X Mish